I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
