Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Terrible idea I love it
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
