you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
