so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize