I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz