There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
