garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize