Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
