It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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