I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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