They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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