careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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