I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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