Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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