what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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