If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
