I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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