I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize
