god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just want nice things and good sex
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize