either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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