I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
