if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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