I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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