Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
