i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize