4 words: hood of his car
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
