Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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