he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
