this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize