Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
