I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
