I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
