i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I came so hard my ears popped.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
