Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
