It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
