we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
