we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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