at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
