buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
