Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
