What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
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the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
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He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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