I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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