Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
