I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If I die, sorry about rent.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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