he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
