It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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