i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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