I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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