Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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