Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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