sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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